Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Practical Magic

There is a witch living in my neighborhood.
I don't know the house she lives in
but I can hear her chanting to the full moon;
casting spells into the darkness.

Perhaps the witch is the cat lady
living down the street,
surrounding herself with claws
and inviting ivy onto her gables.
But she keeps her words to herself,
and only stares blankly out to the street.

Maybe she's my next door neighbor,
complaining of sleepless nights
as she fetches her mail
in her pink fuzzy slippers every morning.
Does she lose her sleep
by finding herself in the backyard
muttering pagan rituals under the stars?

But the witch's voice
is not coated in catnip and smoke,
she does not sound like sleep deprivation,
only velvet,
pillow murmurs and cool comforter cloud dreams.

Sometimes she whispers in my window,
wisdom leaking through the screen,
saying things like,
"Do your homework, girly."

And I know she's right,
but still I sit at my desk,
night after night,
drawing hearts
around the names of each my beloveds.

The first time she did this,
I was so startled,
I ripped the paper in half!
And I knew in that moment,
that boy would never be the same.

Young girls are given chains and leashes
without knowing how to use them.
And even my tortured ignorant mouth has uttered the words "Boys are puppies that need to be trained."
But we need to learn to soften the whipcrack of our tongues and loosen the collar around their necks.

Young men's hearts are such fragile things:
made of
china,
porcelain,
venetian glass.
waiting to be broken
--asking to be broken.

But I can't help but wonder,
who at such a young age
asks for that kind of pain?
Having been wrapped in poison arms
and my ears licked by silver tongues,
I am no stranger
to the incidental invasion
of a trickster practicing his sport.
She knows that we all have tricks of our own trade,
waiting to test them out on any innocent passing our front door.
We're hoping if we shoot the right game that they'll stay for dinner.

There have been countless nights that I have spent
coughing my own ceramic beat up into someone else's hands,
knowing down to my bones
that the only protection for it
would be solitude.
I have been the duct tape girl,
trying to piece together each eggshell frame,
to put those damn horses and men to shame,
even when those around me insist I am just a peasant.
Still, I've tried to untangle those mangled clockwork pulses
without understanding I am wearing the same uniform
as the ones that carry a cat and nine tails
and have cramped cage waiting in their basement.

Spinning a cradle to trap those who have been hurt
makes for a lazy hunter
and simply re-opens any poorly sealed wounds.
Instead, I turn to the witch's words,
insisting that weaving a hammock for broken bones to heal
might leave enough space to quell the bared teeth.

Some nights, I whisper back to her,
"Does this make my ass look fat?"
But mostly questions about the heavens
and the chatter of animals and spirits.
She always answers with compassion,
icing bruises and patching up misunderstanding.

I asked her once,
after I heard her final prayer
why she prays to the moon
if the man in there
looks so sad
and she answered,
"You would be sad too
if embracing your closest companion
would kill millions."

Originally performed on 3/28/11
Originally written on 2/24/2011
Originally slammed on....

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